My Board

I want to leave, to disappear.
I need to escape and find somewhere I can find out who I truly am.
I have no place here, I don’t belong here, what is there to keep me here?
I’m running out of reasons to carry on and I’m tired of having to find them.
I want to give up. Now please. So let me go, release me.
I can see myself, taking my blade and being free, ending all the pain, all that stops me is the thought of you being left here.
And I apologize for being selfish, but even that thought takes little effect anymore.
I need you to promise me that when I’m gone, you wont give up. I need you to release me.
Sat on the roof with the sun setting, silhouetting the trees upon the hill, watching skies of red and gold close like curtains upon the valley, I watch a butterfly land on a warm grey tile and I reach forward with one pale hand. Before I can touch it, it flies off, out of reach.
I want to be the butterfly, to be able to soar away from everything.
I have to go now, but please promise me that you will stay.
I love you more than you could ever know,
Taking my knife from it’s hiding place, I now must sit and wait...